Shards of Reality
by Kaitlinbell
Summary: When you close your eyes, where do you go? Is there happiness? Fear? Concrete friendships? Transient lovers? Perhaps, yes. What if you couldn't wake up though? Better yet, what if you've been asleep all along. Slash. Marco centric, though other characte
1. Default Chapter

Okay. I'm finishing the last chapter of Run But Never Hide as we speak, so give me a bit with that, and this....is my new project. I am really really having fun with this one and I'm incorporating alot of new big ideas into it. I hope you guys like it.

Warnings: Will have slash. Will have a slight bit of language. It seems I cuss when I get emotional. Sorry. And nothing big will happen until later anyway, but I will put a warning on those chapters as well just in case.

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"Go Dylan!"

The crowd surged and seemingly pulsated around him, jostling his shoulders, messing with his balance. Faceless people were jumping and vibrating with nervous energy all around, and the situation probably would have been funny if he wasn't just as far gone as they were. With a loopy grin he felt himself being shoved into his companion. Looking over his shoulder Paige smiled, rolling her eyes at the energetic people surrounding them.

It was a Friday night and the hockey stadium was filled to the breaking point with cheering fans and supportive parents, friends, and significant others. The energy was palpable, as was the excitement and giddy feeling. Marco _loved _Dylan's hockey matches. He always felt so alive, and even with the mugginess due to the crowd's combined body heat, he felt as if he could breathe easier. Plus...watching a sweaty, adrenaline crazed Dylan was always a bonus.

"Oh my god! He's going for it!"

Marco instantaneously jumped to stand on top of his flimsy plastic seat to see what was going on, damning his lack of a decent growth spurt yet again. Craning his neck to see over the sea of heads before him he watched as Dylan skated down the rink, looking like a bolt of lightning forking across a bright white sky. Many oohs and encouraging roars issued from the stadium's occupants and emotions were rising quickly. Dylan was so close....twenty feet, ten feet...five...four....three....

A sudden movement from Dylan's right grabbed the audience's attention, and most importantly, Marco's. In a split second the delicate balance of the tables was thrown off and an opponent hit the puck, changing the direction a complete ninety degrees. Before Marco could even blink, pain erupted from his forehead.

All he could really remember was the flashing of the bright, alien blue lights over the ice and the terrified shriek from Paige from his right, or so he had guessed, and the pain. The most mind-numbing and nerve tearing pain he had ever experienced.. It was intense, spidering its way from his head to every spot on his body like a deadly poison racing against the clock.

The last thing he remembered before his mind succumbed to the blessed, pain relieving darkness was a passion filled yell from the illuminated ice below.

_"MARCO!"_

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_"MARCO!"_

Marco squinted his eyes against the too bright light that was situated over his head and slowly tested his eyes out. Squint. Quick blink. Cringe. Nope. Not happening.

"Oh my god! Bryce! Get everyone....I can't belie-...he- he's WAKING UP!"

Marco scrunched his face slightly. He recognized that voice. Or atleast he thought he did. What was going on anyway? He woke up everyday after all. Slowly Marco tried to peice everything together. There had been bright lights, like the one above him, and screaming, like here. But...it was different. These yells seemed almost...happy? Lights. Yells. Dylan. Hockey match. Dylan had been going for a goal...he had almost been there.....

Oh.

Hearing very loud shuffles around his bed, yes, he was in a bed, he decided that his poor eyes would have to suffer. Finding out what was going on was more important. With unworldly strength he somehow managed to lift his leaden eyelids. The blinding light assaulted his eyes but he toughed it out, blinking owlishly against all the white.

White. White and green. Lots of it. Peering blearily ahead of him the first thing he saw was quite a relief.

"El?"

The redheaded girl bounded from a very uncomfortable looking burgandy chair in the corner and all but launched herself at her Italian friend, a muffled greeting ending up in his shoulder. Marco patted her head awkwardly and was a bit frightened when he felt the scaulding warmth of tears on his neck.

"El? Oh El, what's wrong? Why are crying."

This was odd. Really odd. One, he'd never seen Ellie really cry. She was a master at hiding her feelings from the world, preferring to lock her emotions within herself than to be hurt. Secondly, she had also never been the most tactile of people. And yet here she was clinging for dear life to his neck and not appearing to let up anytime soon. Uncomfortable was perhaps the best word for this rather bizarre situation.

"El? Are you okay? Don't cry. Please, I hate to see you like this. What's wrong?"

His questions were not answered, and if anything her tears seemed to intensify with the very sound of his voice. After about half an hour of her sobs and shaking shoulders, she finally sat back slightly to look into Marco's dark eyes with her red-ringed ones. When she spoke her voice cracked horribly, but never raised at all, so quiet it was almost unheard.

"You- you're actually awake. You're freaking AWAKE! It's all so amazing."

Marco was beyond confused. Cocking his head slightly he gazed at her stupidly. "El, I couldn't have been out for more than a week. What has gotten you so upset?"

He should have known something was wrong the second he saw her bewildered stare. It seemed to hold a sense of unknown that was unsettling in a way that made you want to instinctively run in the opposite direction. It seemed dark.

"Marco...Marco listen to me love." Marco's head jerked roughly at the pet name. Something was definitely wrong. Ellie never tossed affection around so lighlty. This couldn't be Ellie. Surely. She was so out of character.

"Marco...you have to tell me. What was the last thing you remember?"

With a heavy sigh he scrubbed at his head, mussing his hair up and raising his eyes up to meet his slightly different friend. "I was at the hockey match, watching Dylan play. One of the other players....he showed up out of nowhere. There was no way to stop him."

Marco gulped audibly and looked down at his hands that were clenching the sterile bedsheets tightly. "Next thing I know a puck is heading straight for my head and everyone's screaming. Then it all went black....and I woke up here."

Ellie was staring at him with a look of dumb confusion. "You were at Dylan's hockey match?"

"Yes," he replied uneasily.

"Oh jesus. I'll be right back. Don't move!"

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Reviews are, for lack of a better word, spiffy. I love them. They are like my lifeblood.


	2. The story unfolds

::points and laughs like an immature three year old:: You guys must really really hate cliffhangers. While I am very sorry for putting you all through the pain, I'm sorry to say that I found it very funny. But, fear not! Here is the second chapter! Muah.

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"Oh jesus. I'll be right back. Don't move!"

Marco watched with wide eyes as the redhead jumped up from the mattress and sprinted from the room. Odd. What was going on?

The room now felt uncomfortably quiet, and, noticing this, Marco decided now was perhaps the time to figure out where he was. Blinking under the still too bright lights he swiveled his head around in all directions trying to take in everything at once.

The first thing that came to mind was he was in a hospital. Everything was blindingly white or a light sea green, with two chairs in the corner that looked anything but comfy. A TV, a sink, a door to the right that probably held a bathroom. Typical. But then again...it seemed very "lived in." It didn't seem like a room that one stayed in for a short period of time, and there didn't seem to be any fancy little beeping and whirring machines situated around his bed checking his pulse and breathing. It was like a very sterile bedroom.

The only other thing that really gave it away were the voices outside. Happy, carefree voices floating in through the still open doorway. Marco closed his eyes and smiled softly as the soft, tinkling sound of children's laughter reached his ears. The voices were all young he noted.

He was just about to sit up again to check his head, when Ellie bounded back through the door, a man following behind her. The man was in his mid-forties with sandy hair and kind blue eyes, carrying a clipboard in one hand. His doctor, he supposed.

To Marco's supreme surprise, three other people entered the room after the man. A girl his age he'd never seen before, his grandmother, and weirdly enough....Sean. Oh stop it Marco, he thought. Ellie's dating him, of course there was a chance he'd be here if she was.

Instead of dwell on the presence of Sean he turned his gaze towards the mysterious girl. She was a few inches taller than Ellie and made of a more sturdy build. She had inquisitive blue eyes shining out from beneath her hair, that was dark brown and cut in a short bob, curling under her ears. He guessed she was a bit of a tomboy too, at the sight of the too large hockey jersey that was draped over her shoulders and ended just above her jean covered knees.

"Marco?"

Marco jumped out of his silent inspection of the girl and turned to Ellie. Seeing the worry and concern in her eyes, he felt a bit of cold leak into his stomach at the sight.

"Marco, love, Mr. Vaughn needs to ask you a few questions, and um, you need to answer them truthfully okay?" He felt the cold feeling in his stomach expand a bit at her words. There was that lightly flung about affection she had done earlier. It just wasn't like her. This was beginning to become strange in a frightening way. First Ellie started acting different, then Sean and the unknown girl...and now those worried words. This couldn't be good.

Marco nodded mutely, not trusting his voice too much at this point. The doctor smiled warmly in his direction and dragged up a rolling stool to the side of his bed and took a seat. Marco watched out of the corner of his eye as the others took a seat, Sean and Ellie ending up on the floor, Ellie sitting in front of the other girl and leaning her head on the her knee.

He was still staring at the trio in the left corner when the doctor cleared his throat. "Marco? I need you to tell me exactly what happened before you woke up."

And so it went. Marco sighed heavily and layed back into the fluffy pillows, recounting the hockey game and the blow to the head with a little more detail than he had the first time. The doctor's brow furrowed as his story came to a close and he jotted a note down on his clipboard. Strange.

"Thank you, Marco. That was helpful. Now I'm going to ask you a few more, okay?" Marco nodded the affirmative, wondering for the fifteen millionth time what was going on.

"Tell me about you life, Marco. Everything. Home life, friends, dating, likes, dislikes. Absolutely anything and everything you can think of as it comes to you. Do you think you could do that for me?"

"Y-yes. Um, I-I...I live with my ma and pa about two blocks from Degrassi High. I'm best friends with Ellie." He stopped, flashing a soft grin in the girl's direction, before turning back to the doctor, missing the pained smile he had gotten in return. "Um, I was dating someone at the time...it's not important," he said blushing.

Marco sighed. "I'm sorry. I'm so very confused. What's going on? Why are you asking all these questions?"

Looking in the corner he saw Ellie with silent tears falling down her face and the taller girl behind her, whispering into her ear. Ellie was crying again. Unease was coursing through his veins like mercury. From the intense expression on Sean's face he could only guess that the situation wasn't going to look any better.

"Marco..." the doctor started, touching his shoulder to get his attention. "You....well, four monthes ago you were in an accident. A gay bashing from what Ellie has told me. There were five men. Does this sound familiar to you at all?"

Again he nodded.

"Good. But, now I must ask you to retell your memory of the event." Odd, Marco mused. Toto? I don't think we're in Kansas any longer. Looking over at the doctor again he felt the urge to laugh at the whole situation, but just stopped himself.

I don't think we're even on the same planet.

"Well, I was going to Dylan's hockey game..." a muffled sob came from the corner and Marco snapped his head in that direction, seeing Ellie's face buried in the other girl's knees and shoulders shaking at his words. Unnerved greatly, he shook his head and turned back around.

"I had gotten off at the wrong stop. I was in a gay village...and it was dark. All I really remember was entering a grassy area and having all these men show up and start beating me, calling me a fag.....I'm sorry. What does this have to do with anything!" he yelled, voice raising.

The doctor gazed at him with those warm blue eyes for several moments before finally speaking in a concerned whisper. "It has everything to do with this. Because you see, the night you were beaten....was the night you first came here."

_What?_ "No I didn't. A police officer cleaned me up and Jimmy came and made sure I got home safely."

"No Marco. This is where you have to listen and _try to understand. _There was a night where you were beaten by a bunch of men for your orientation. BUT, on this night you were flung around and at one point your head was bashed into a tree. The blow was taken violently to your frontal lobe and that night you were immediately taken to a hospital."

No. What was this man saying? This was wrong. He had gone home with Jimmy that night. How dare this man say something that was so against everything he knew! Something went against what he had seen with his very eyes, and been a part of no less. But the doctor continued.

"After two days at the hospital it was apparent you were not going to wake anytime soon. You had fallen into a coma and you were moved here, because the chances that you hadn't recieved brain damage were slim to none."

"Wait." Marco pleaded. What? "What are you saying?! Where am I?! Ellie, tell him he's wrong!" The crying girl looked at him sadly, but didn't say a word. "Ellie, you have to....you have to tell him he's wrong! Tell him none of that ever happened!!!"

Ellie only let out a loud sob and buried her head back in the knee where it had been earlier. Ellie....

Ellie **_believed _**him! She thought he was right! That Marco was insane and was making it all up!

"Marco! Calm down before you hyperventilate. Just talk to us. We want to help you."

With tears now burning in his eyes, he turned back to the doctor, scared out his mind. "Are you....are you telling me I've been asleep for four monthes? That my whole life....everything I've been through.....I made it all up?"

"Basically, yes. The fact that you can obviously pick out certain people, Ellie for example, shows that you remembered very small details from reality. A type of selective amnesia due to head trauma. In most cases, the patient will slowly gain past memories as time goes on, perhaps even one day remembering everything."

"Oh God, this is an absolute nightmare." he moaned into his hands.

The doctor smiled down at the dark boy and patted him on the shoulder. "More like you've finally woken up from the nightmare. I know this is hard for you. You've been seemingly living your life for years....only to wake up and find that it was all a lie. You've been lying in this bed for four monthes with these wonderful people," he paused, grinning up at the group in the corner. "Whom love you very much, watching over you. Try to focus on that more than the panic. It will get easier with time. I promise."

Clearing his throat the nice man stood up, and jotted a last note on his clipboard before smiling and slipping the pen into his pocket. "I'll leave you all to catch up now. Marco, I think, if you don't black out on us, it would be safe for you to go home tomorrow evening. Not many cases have a relapse so you should be relatively safe from this point out. Now all there is left to do is adjust and live your new life. I'll see you later tonight to talk some more. I'm afraid the questions aren't over yet. We need to find out just how much ,exactly, that you do know. Bye."

The second the door closed with a soft click, he had an armful of crying teenage girl and a silently weeping Nana running a hand through his hair. "Ciao il mio ragazzo."

"Ciao nana. Come siete?" She only smiled at him and ruffled his hair, eyes shining brighter than before.

"El? Um, I can't breathe." She rushed off of him as if he had burned her. "Oh, I'm sorry! I didn't mean- Just, sorry.

"Anyway, I guess this is all a bit much isn't it?"

"You always were one for understating things." At his words, Ellie's face fell a bit. He knew she was probably thinking "how would you know?" but he didn't want to dwell on it. Better to try and stick with what he had, at one time atleast, found normal.

"Well," Marco's grandmother, better known as Nana, stated. "Let's try to catch you up, yes?"

Marco nodded. And so it began.....the first shaky step on the road leading to who knows where. Marco clenched his eyes tightly.

Oh, please let me wake up!

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(I used a translator so they are more than likely wrong. Don't hate me. ::shields self::)

Translations:

_Ciao il mio ragazzo_--hello my boy.

_Ciao nana. Come siete?_--Hello, nana. How are you?

Review! Please! Or I'll um....I'll sick my evil minion clowns on you!!!!


	3. Everything?

Yelak- oh dear. You think it twists now? Just you wait until you're done with this one. lol. I'm glad you like it so far.

Blue Leah- Um, in a way yes. I tried to straighten that out for you in this chapter. Hope it's not too confusing.

Blood Angel- I tried to email you but it wouldn't show up. stupid Anyway, you always give me great reviews. Thank you. And Dylan will be here. He'll be mentioned quite a lot actually. But for plot purposes I shall say nothing. lol

Sloan Miette- you will find out about the "wacko" this chapter. lol

Lindsay- I'm so sorry you're confused! I hope it will clear up for you eventually.

melissa- I'm sorry about the translations. I suck at Italian and the traslator sucks too. lol.

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"Well, let's try to catch you up, yes?"

Marco shifted uneasily and signaled for the two of them to sit on the end of the bed, throwing a shielded glance over their shoulders to the two in the corner who had yet to say anything at all. He'd need to ask about them later.

The first to speak was Ellie as she situated herself atop the white bedspread and wiggled around excitedly. "What do you want to know first?"

"Oh, I guess everything. It's a little crazy right now." Marco said, giggling slightly. Ellie had changed her demeanor completely, going from hysterical to bubbly in a few seconds time. He didn't mind, it was just hard to get used to. And if he was completely honest with himself (something he was avoiding at the moment) he'd even say that he enjoyed the company of this more emotionally revealing Ellie than the bland, watered down girl he had known in his mind.

"There's one thing that's throwing me off. In my world...er, my head I mean, you were there...." Marco said, stopping short and glancing up at the girl with a confused expression. "But, El, you were so different. Nothing like what you are here."

She quickly looked down at her folded knees and Marco caught the movement of her hands, like she was pretending to pop a rubber band over her wrist. Perhaps not everything was so different. "Did you like me better there?"

Her voice sounded so sad, and yet again, Marco was amazed by her abrupt shift in emotions, though still mad that he had upset her at all. He reached forward, grabbing her hands in his and making sure she made eye contact with him before he spoke. "No, no. You were just different. There....there you were so quiet and you never cried." He cocked his head to the side and sighed tiredly, as if realizing something. "You didn't smile all that much either."

Ellie smiled one of those smiles in his direction and squeezed his hands, nudging his nana with her elbow and earning a smile in return. On que, the elderly woman pitched in. "Ellie _was_ like that...until she met you."

Marco looked suitably surprised and begged for them to tell him the story. And Ellie complied, bubbly as ever..

"You'd just come to school in grade ten, and I liked you immediately. We were friends for quite awhile. I guess you could say we fell for each other due to less than desirable circumstances." A sad smile gave her away, and Marco knew they would need a conversation about this comment later. Smiling encouragingly at her in return she sighed and continued.

"Then we started dated. One night, we went upstairs and when I tried to kiss you I could tell you were put off." Nana started giggling next to her and the woman recieved raised eyebrows from every other person in the room. Two in Marco's case. The nana in his head was quiet, never speaking, and stern, but at the same time he sensed something inately the same about her. Seeing her giggling like a smitten school girl was quite a sight, though not one he minded.

"Anyway, insane Nana aside, that night you told me you might be gay and ever since then we have been the best of friends." Now Marco grew hesitant.

"Have...have I ever dated anyone else, El?"

Ellie's eyes grew very very sad and she shook her head slowly. No Dylan here. Numbness was spreading from his fingers outward. There was no Dylan here. NO, his mind screamed.

Nana saw their expressions and she jumped up immediately. "I think we should probably leave and let Marco sleep more, yes?" Ellie nodded and, after a moment's hesitation, crawled forward on her hands and knees, kissing Marco's forehead and then his nose, making the dead feeling in his stomach stop short and slowly turn warm. What would he have done if Ellie had never been there? Here or anywhere else?

"I'll see you later, hun." Marco watched as she shifted off the bed, looking very much like a cat, and then walked over to the other four in the corner. He watched as Sean lifted an arm and placed it over her shoulders and kissed her temple. Atleast that hadn't changed. Sean was good for her in his world, and he didn't doubt he was just as great for her mental state here. Sean also threw an arm around the other girl's shoulders, and whispered something in her ear that made her smile tiredly at him.

"Wait!" They all stopped and stared back at him. "Sorry, it's just. I-" Marco stopped and smiled at the brunette girl. "I never got to meet you."

She beemed at Sean, as if saying "I told you so" and disentangled herself from his arm, walking over to the bed and hugging him tightly. "I was afraid you wouldn't remember me," she whispered. "I'm Bryce." She stepped back and through an endearing look over at Ellie. "I met you through El there almost three years ago."

"Three years ago? How is that possible?"

Nana looked at him strangely, but walked forward to sit on his bed again. "What do you mean, caro?"

"Well....I've only been at Degrassi for two years." The strange looks grew almost comical at that.

"Marco, you been here for three years. You're a grade twelve." Marco stared at his grandmother as if she had sprouted a new head. "What?"

"You're seventeen! You been at Degrassi for three years!" Oh. My. God.

"But....but I should atleast know that! I should remember Bryce! I-...I thought this was just amnesia! I thought everything up until the bashing was real!" Ellie rushed over and forced him to lie down, cooing nonsense in his ear. "Calm down, Marco. Just calm down."

"El- El, what's going on! Why can't I _remember_?! Mr. Vaughn never said anything about this!"

"Shh....you have to calm down. Typically, in these cases, the patient doesn't remember anything at all. Usually just people and places, maybe a few events. But usually, their life in general is taken away from them. You're a senior...and you've known all of us since then. Please, love, you've got to calm down."

Marco was still breathing very heavily and his eyes were still bouncing all over the room as if looking for an escape. **Everything**? Everything was gone? He'd thought perhaps the things before the bashing were all correct. Things he could go off of....but now he was wrong yet again. He was having to start over at the very freaking beginning. Start from scratch.

"I-...oh God. I think I need some time....and some sleep. I just...oh man." Ellie nodded and kissed his crown again, smoothing the hair back. She leaned forward and whispered in his ear. "I'll watch over you tonight. It's my turn anyway. I'll be here when you speak to Mr. Vaughn. Okay?"

Marco nodded so slightly it was almost unseen and Ellie climbed off of him, and the four left, leaving him to stare at the ceiling in a whirlwind of fear and uncertainty.

_Everything _was gone.

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It was dusk now. The room was thrown into a world of burnt oranges and yellows, the mellow golds sliding up his bedspread towards his limp hands that lay on top them. The door had been left open after they left and he felt calmer being able to listen to the steady stream of voices outside his room that seemed to match the warm atmosphere surrounding him.

They had left two hours ago and he'd never really fallen asleep. How could he? He also didn't think he'd ever cried this much in his life. He felt completely and utterly drained....from everything. And quite disgusting from not having a shower in what felt like weeks.

He had found time to get up and look at his mirror reflection at one point. He had had dried tear tracks all over his cheeks and his eyes were ringed in red. His hair had been a surprise, easily past his shoulders and making it's way down. Marco supposed being locked away in a room for four monthes would keep him from a haircut, but yuck!

He also noticed the sharp edges of maturity creeping up on his face around his jaw line, nose, and brow. He definitely looked older. And thinking back, he was amazed to find that the Ellie, Sean, and Nana he had seen earlier had also showed very subtle changes in their appearance, though he hadn't noticed at the time.

Ellie looked practically the same, though she had finished developing and had finally reached her adult height. The laugh lines around her eyes made Marco feel better, knowing that she seemed very happy in this world....though the tell tale lines from worry that were also apparent made him feel guilty.

Age had made the most affect on Sean, he noted. And, Marco thought, he looked much better for it. He had lost a lot of the baby fat he had once had and his face was definitely more angular than it had once been. He was taller and thinner, but also looked stronger than before. Marco wondered how he hadn't noticed, because now, the overall change hit him hard. Sean wasn't ugly...that was for sure.

Nana had changed too...but her being so old, one couldn't really tell. Her eyes gave her away. They looked as if they held so much more than they once did. More pain. More joy. More fun. Marco felt upset that he missed all the events that made her gaze at him in that fond way.

It wasn't fair! During his two hours of silence he had thought about a lot of things. Questions had been moving around his brain nonstop, and they were still zooming about just as unanswered as they had always been.

A soft knock on the door frame brought him out of his thoughts with a jolt, and he watched in something akin to relief as Mr. Vaughn walked into the room exuding the same fatherly charm he had earlier.

"Hello, Marco. Adjusting I hope?"

Marco yawned lazily, grimacing inwardly at the pop his jaw made. "Adjusting yes. Adjusting well? Not so much."

The doctor smiled down at him and took out his pen before beginning. "Eleanor called me a moment ago to tell me she would be here in a second. Would you like to-" Mr. Vaughn was cut off as a flurry of red ran into the room, harsh breathing filling the air.

"I'm here! Sorry! Nana's car was acting up."

"Quite alright Mrs. Nash. Come join us." Marco grinned softly and held out his hand in invitation for Ellie to sit beside him. Once she was seated and holding tightly on to his hand, the doctor turned to Marco.

"Ellie told me you got a bit of a surprise earlier?"

"Um, yes. The way you phrased it....I...I thought I'd only made up tiny bits and pieces...not the entire thing."

"Yes, I'm very sorry about that. It must be very hard for you to wrap your mind around all of this. Do you have any questions?" Marco shook his head no. "Alright then, I'll question you."

"Could you perhaps describe to me what Mrs. Nash was like in your world?"

Marco looked to Ellie and felt bad for the things he was going to say. "She was quiet. She never showed much emotion or anything like that. You hardly ever got to see her laugh and when you did you could tell she was holding back. I always got the feeling she was deathly afraid of being hurt, so she never allowed anyone to get close enough. I was always worried about her. Especially when she started to date Sean, because that was a lot to get used to for her."

With a deep breath he finally finished and stared down at their joined hands. He almost jumped out of his skin when he felt a squeeze. Marco glanced up to see Ellie smiling at him. Perhaps he really had nothing to worry about. She'd baby step with him.

"Interesting. What about Mr. Cameron?" Oh. Strange.

"Well, we were never really close. I only knew him through Ellie really. He didn't seem to like me much, because Ellie was always around me instead of being alone with him. I don't know much about him."

"Hm." To Marco, that hm seemed to say a lot more than it should have. A look at Ellie told him it meant more too.

"And what of Mrs. Carmichael?"

"Huh?"

Ellie whispered to him. "That's Bryce."

"Oh, oh, uh, nothing. Nothing at all."

The questioning went on for the better of an hour. Marco didn't really see what the questions helped any. They were about people. His family was never mentioned, only his friends. The doctor hinted that friendships, often times, were remembered more easily.

He was asked to give a timeline of his life with the stupidest things included, like when he said his first words. A few times though, Ellie would muffle a sob behind her free hand, like something he remembered was heartbreaking.

The doctor finally left around seven, and nightfall was fast approaching, the sky turning slowly more and more purple as time progressed. Ellie was still looking down at him and holding his hand, mournfully playing with his hair in an absent minded manner.

"This is hard El," he whispered.

"I know," she replied, equally soft. "You want to talk about it?"

Marco sighed and kissed her hand. One thing _had _been bothering him. "Ellie, no one has yet to mention ma and pa. Have they been at work all this time?"

The second the words were out of his mouth he knew he never should have asked. No sooner had he finished his sentence had Ellie's face crumpled completely and she had dove her face into his chest. Marco could feel the hot tears soaking the hospital gown he was wearing and he felt like crying himself. This could not be good.

A muffled sob into his chest made him look down at her. "What?" She raised her tear stained face and kissed his forehead, still crying very hard.

"They're dead. Marco."

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Review! Pleeeeease.

Sorry about all the errors too. I'm in a hurry and about to walk out the door. It will be better next time.


	4. They're dead?

This is my substitute for candy. Happy Halloween you guys!

And to everyone who has asked....everyone will eventually be mentioned or make an appearance. Dylan especially. Everyone will be here. But....Marco hasn't even left the institution yet, so all we have so far are the key players. Don't worry, I'm not leaving anyone out.

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"They're dead, Marco."

Through the rushing in his ears Marco vaguely realized that his mouth had fallen open. The words didn't seem to be able to transfer through his numb mind. He could visual a little computer screen in his head with flashing letters. "Does Not Compute! Does Not Compute!"

When the imaginary computer exploded in his mind he definitely didn't feel any better. How could they be....

"Dead?"

Ellie nodded morosely and when she reached forward to wipe away the tears that were falling down his face (when had that happened?) he flinched away. "Marco, I....it shouldn't have been me who told you. I just...oh God, I don't know what to say to you."

Marco finally collected himself enough to focus on her instead of the white wall behind her shoulder, and kissed her forehead. "No. Thank you. I just....had no idea." They were gone too. Forever. Just like everything else. "How...how long?"

With a sniffle Ellie draped herself across Marco and buried her head under his chin, arms sliding under his limp body to hug him close. "They're actually the reason you're here at all." Sniff. Marco sniffed after her and buried a hand in her hair to warm his chilled fingers...or for the comfort offered in this action. It didn't seem to matter at this point.

"You were living in Italy....it was your parents anniversary." Sniff. "You were staying with Nana that night. Oh Marco. They were home."

Marco hiccupped into her hair and clutched her closer, wishing to simply sink into the bed coverings and die right there. "The police came to Nana's house later, told her about the accident....Nana told me you had fainted that night. The only night you ever had."

Marco stared up at the ceiling wondering how this could happen. This world seemed so nice....and now it was crashing down around him. He was having to dodge falling debri that left him shaking and sobbing in other people's arms, sift through the ruin to find some semblance of order to hold on to, if only for a moment's worth of time. And here...now...was the nuclear bomb he hadn't even seen coming.

"A month later you moved here. To leave behind bad memories Nana had said. You've been here ever since."

An hour of crying later Marco was certain Ellie had fallen asleep with her head buried in his tear soaked neck and she was breathing deeply, stirring his long hair. This was what he had to focus on. Ellie. Ellie and everything she was to him. She had stayed with him after the story was finished and held him for what felt like years while he cried. He had cried and cried, until he was sure his very soul had leaked out with his tears.

Now he was quiet however, utterly drained. The clock on the opposite wall told him it had been four hours since Ellie had retold that particular past event. He was dead tired but couldn't seem to be able to keep his eyes closed for a second's time before a made up image of his parents' dead faces flashed across the darkness.

He had come to grips with it, if it counted for anything. It was still entirely too fresh to forget completely, but he knew it would one day be easy to push to the back of his mind. Right now, all he could do was pretend it hadn't happened. Denial wasn't just a river in Egypt after all. In fact, if it weren't for denial, he would have gone crazy by now.

Except, his mind chipped in, he _was_ crazy. He'd been lying in a mental institute for four monthes of his life.

Before he knew it, pale sunlight was beginning to filter in through the window on the left wall and the birds were making quite a racket outside. Marco smiled sadly and sighed. Finally, he wasn't forced to be lying in the dark any longer. The sun continued rising and crawled up the bed towards his head, throwing Ellie's hair into a bright flaming red with golden tinsel threaded in. She was still asleep.

Marco hoped she wouldn't be that way for too much longer. He didn't like being alone. Which was silly, he thought, because she was right there, lying directly on top of him...just as real as he was. It's just...he didn't like the silence. It left him to actually **think **about what's been going on. Namely...his parents. Something he absolutely _did not _want to dwell on.

Marco sniffed and scrubbed at his face. God, he had to stop crying...he was sure he'd run out of body fluids if he wasn't careful. At his movement, he felt Ellie shift against him and rub her nose into his neck, cuddling closer. To him, it seemed they layed like this before...a million times over. Where the feeling came from, he wasn't sure....but he liked it. He liked everything to do with the Ellie in this world. She seemed to love him without reservation and with everything she had...and in turn, she seemed to need it too. It was an indescribably good thing to think of this connection between them.

"El fall asleep on you again?"

Marco just stopped himself from jumping up from the bed and waking the red head in his surprise. With wide eyes he looked over at the doorway and saw the girl named Bryce, looking rather chipper and awake, wearing a pair of overalls and an orange shirt.

"Does she do this often?" he asked, after calming down, trying to make conversation. If he was correct, he would be spending quite a lot of time with this girl. Best to get to know her now.

Bryce smiled sunnily at him and took a seat on the rolling stool next to his bed. "Yeah. Poor thing. If she stays up late she'll simply crash on the nearest available person."

She placed a small bundle of cloth on the sink's countertop before turning around to speak to him. "I brought you some clothes. I rather thought you wouldn't like to walk out of here in that hospital gown. Though I daresay some of the patients wouldn't mind oggling your ass on the way out."

Marco ducked his head and blushed madly, all while the girl grinned down at him. "Glad to see you're just as easy to embarrass as you've always been. How'd it go last night?"

At this, he ran a hand through Ellie's hair and tried to keep a rein on his emotions. "It was okay," he whispered. "The questioning with Mr. Vaughn was easy enough....but after he left..."

Sensing his discomfort, the blue eyed girl reached over and took his free hand, squeezing it gently. "El told me....she told me in this world...my parents were dead." Damn, he thought, I'm crying again. To his surprise, Bryce leaned forward and kissed his nose, smoothing back his hair. Did everyone touch and comfort this much here?

"Yeah...we were all really afraid when you would ask. We were afraid who would have to tell you. Are you....are you alright?" Marco shook his head no, but did offer a strained smile, trying to show her he was dealing as best he could.

Bryce nodded and sat back, still holding on to his hand. "So are you ready to go home today?"

"Yeah, I suppose so." Marco said, inwardly thanking her for the change in topic, and smiled down at Ellie as she made a little snuffling noise that was adorable, if he did say so himself. He looked over at the other girl to see her watching the red head with an expression of fond warmth in her eyes.

"You know me through El?"

"Yes," she said, tearing her eyes away from the sleeping teenager. "I met El...oh it must have been two years ago. She was dating Sean at the time, and I was so jealous! Sean was a great guy. Anyway, we've been tight ever since then, and she introduced me to you after that." Bryce stopped and smiled at Marco as he bobbed his head as she told her story.

"I don't go to Degrassi though. I live about thirty minutes from here and I come down every day. I usually stay with you guys on the weekends. Nana has practically adopted me."

Marco liked her. He didn't know what it was about her...but she seemed like a very good friend. Maybe it was how wide and curious her eyes were, or how they lit up when she was speaking to himself, or Ellie, or Sean. She seemed to care about them all...much the same way Ellie did.

"I'm glad I've gotten to meet you....though I'm upset I can't remember you at all. I'm so sorry."

To his surprise, she didn't look too upset about it. She squeezed his hand and rolled her eyes playfully. "Mr. Vaughn said that it's not your choice what you remember or don't remember. It's all a great big game of chance. The fact that you don't seem to remember much about Sean either, makes me think that it's not that big of a deal that I was forgotten. Don't beat yourself up over it, Atlas."

"Atlas?"

Her grin got wider at his inquiry. "Atlas...you know, the god who supposedly held up the world on his shoulders? It's been a nickname of yours for ages. You have that habit of thinking everything is your fault. Sean gave it to you, actually, now that I think about it."

Marco sighed tiredly. "We must have been really great friends. I would have liked to be a part of it." He slammed his head back into the pillows and growled low in his throat. "But, no...I can't remember even a bit of it."

"Hey, hey," she soothed quietly. "Don't worry about it. You're still a part of it. It's not like we've changed at all. We're waiting for dumb Mr. Vaughn to release his clutch on you so we can take you home and fill you in. We can't wait to help you remember."

Bryce scooted her chair up a bit before she continued. "You were practically the glue that held us all together. We were quite a wreck after your accident. I remember El had sat by your bed for a solid week without eating or sleeping before I forced her to go home with me. Sean was yelling at anything that moved. Nana was the same...just a bit quieter. Not much phases her. But you could tell she was very upset. "

She paused and ruffled his hair with a smitten smile. "You were always her favorite. Me- me I played horribly out on the ice. We were just so upset that you were gone. Life seemed so dull without you around for so long.....But you're here now. You saw how much El was bawling over there when you first woke up. We're all just so happy you're back."

Marco could feel his eyes burning. Who knew he would be missed so much? "I had no idea."

As a comfortable silence descended between them another snuffling noise broke it. Very slowly Ellie stirred and shuffled around, finally lifting her head groggily to smile down into Marco's face. "Um, sorry."

"No, no, it's okay. I'm very warm for once." Ellie laughed very lightly in his ear, and Marco felt a surge of happiness soar through him. How often had he gotten to hear Ellie laugh like that? It was so nice to hear. So comforting. He hoped beyond hope, that the Ellie here laughed often. Laughed all of the time even....and then some...because it was so great to see her happy.

"So, Bryce, where is Sean?" Ellie enquired, after blinking several times to wake up.

"Oh, you know him. He doesn't get up before noon. Did you actually expect him to come this early?Marco notwithstanding."

Ellie made a face and burrowed down into Marco's covers again, mumbling up sarcastically from his chest. "Marco notwithstanding. Pfft. I hope he wakes up by falling on the floor."

Marco's eyebrows scrunched up and he cast a bewildered look over at Bryce. "Oh, she's always like this. She drives Sean up the walls. Don't know how I can stand her."

He smiled and tickled Ellie's neck. "So how are you and Sean?"

She looked up through a veil of red hair and smiled brightly. "Um, I guess we're great. We fight like crazy. Why do you ask?"

"I dunno. I was just wondering since you guys have actually been together for about two years instead of just the one in my head."

"I don't follow."

"You and Sean. You guys started dating midway through tenth year right?"

Ellie's look of confusion quickly changed. "Oh! Oh, yes, sorry. I was wondering what you were talking about. Yeah, we did date in tenth grade."

"Did?" Wait...they weren't anymore? From Ellie's expression he could tell she was just as lost as he was. This was confusing.

"Yeah, _did_. We broke up before eleventh year. You don't remember that?"

Wow. This was a change of pace. Here he was thinking that Ellie and Sean were still together and completely happy as they used to be. But they had seemed so close yesterday. He would have bet money they were together.

"So you two aren't an item anymore?" A snort from Bryce caused him to look over at her, and watch as she giggled uncontrollably, obviously finding this situation extremely funny.

"Marco, I haven't been with Sean since then. I was stolen away, you could say." She paused and laughed at something he didn't know. Man, he felt so out of the loop.

"So you went with someone else? Who? Was Sean sore about it?"

A bigger blast of laughing came from Bryce's corner and Ellie seemed to be having trouble keeping her humor under wraps too.

"Um, Marco, hun....I've been dating Bryce for almost two years now."

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Surprise. lol. And another cliffhanger. Sorry! It was getting too long again! I had to stop! Blame it on...um, somebody else!!! Anyway, please review. They are needed and cherished.


	5. Home

Sorry about the wait. Homework...blah blah blah....finishing RBNH....blah blah blah....you know. But here it is! Squee!

Oh, and I am aware that the stupid thing ate a couple of my words last post. Marco's parent's died in a car crash on the way home. Sorry about that.

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"Um, Marco, hun....I've been dating Bryce for almost two years now."

Marco blinked rapidly in succession, wondering if perhaps he had heard wrong. But....but Bryce was a _girl_! A _female_! Which would make Ellie a...a... It wasn't until several seconds of stunned silence later, that were only broken by the boyish girl still giggling manically in her corner, that he realized he had, in fact, heard correctly.

"But...._what_?" he gibbered faintly. "H-how long have you been _gay_? Have you _always_ been?"

He realized that if the situation had been a bit different he probably would have been rolling on the ground along with Ellie's "girlfriend." _But, _as it were, all he could really do is stare at her and do his own personal goldfish impression.

Ellie raised her eyes, and with an evil smirk snorted loudly at his shocked tone and shared a look with Bryce before turning and grinning down at Marco again.

"I've never been **_gay_** at all."

Now Marco was thoroughly confused. The bewilderment must have been apparent on his face because Bryce's tame giggles turned back into their former howls of amusement, reverberating loudly around the room and swirling in his ears like a mocking whirlwind.

Very cranky by this point Marco growled in the back of his throat and rubbed his face tiredly. "I don't understand. I'm far too stupid at the moment for you to keep speaking in riddles, El. English _please_."

She had the decency to sober up a bit and quit smiling like the village idiot, if only for a moment. "I've never been _gay_. Or atleast I don't like to think I am. I've dated Sean...dated you. I liked you both tremendously. Then, of course, I'm with Bryce, and the feeling is definitely as amazing as you two, if not better in some ways."

"So you're bisexual?" he questioned, scratching his head and arching his eyebrows. Why couldn't she just _make sense_?

At his inquiry Ellie's light laugh filled the room again. A sudden shift and Marco realised she was getting up off of him, coming perilously close to kneeing him a couple of times on her way up, kicking off blankets and placing hands in awkward places. At last, she was finally on her feet and away from bodily harming him. She turned to Marco and shrugged lazily as if to indicate the situation was no big deal.

"No, not exactly. I liked you because you were sweet. I liked Sean because he appealed to my independent, freakish side And I like Bryce because well.....she appeals to me in every way." Ellie smiled at the end of her sentence, as if willing her words to make sense for him, and then walked over to the sink, riffling through the bundle of clothing until she procured a bright green pontytail holder with an accomplished "ah ha."

Facing Marco again she sat daintily on the brunette girl's knee, holding up her hand with the tie slightly behind her ear, signaling for the other girl to take it. After an affectionate sigh, Bryce reached forward and pulled her hair back from her face with swift, practiced movements that spoke of doing an action a million times, and then wound the band around the bunched up hair, all the while smiling softly. Unoccupied, Ellie continued her explanation.

"It's never been about what body parts a person had or how deep their voice was. I've always been attracted to the personality and the silly things that make them unique. The fact that Bryce here is a female never really meant much, just made it a bit harder to tell people about."

Marco blatantly stared at her, jaw some place near his stomach. Of all the things he'd come to expect from Ellie, that was perhaps the last. It seemed in both worlds she could throw you for a loop.

And what a loop it was.

This rather startling change of events, he realized yet again, only made him love this version of her more. Here she was so...happy and carefree, and seemingly totally at ease with who she was and what she had been given in life. She walked with her head held up high and facing the world. She cried openly, and she touched even more so. It was like a reinvention of the girl he knew. Taking all her more looked down upon traits and morphing them into strengths in a very subtle way. Exactly the same person...yet crazily different. She was, he concluded, a _beautiful _person.

"Oh."

"Here I was, waiting for some profound reaction, but typical to Marco del Rossi style...I get a one syllable response. Bravo, dear," Ellie giggled behind her hand.

Marco blushed and stuck his tongue out at the girls in retaliation. "Sorry. That was just the last thing I was expecting. I think it's brilliant though. I'm glad you're happy."

Bryce beamed at him sunnily and squeezed Ellie around the middle before she maneuvered herself out from under her and stood up. "I'm going to go get some breakfast and see if I can track down Mr. Vaughn. I'll be right back," she mumbled, making vague motions towards the door.

Ellie nodded, watching her leave, then swiveled around in her chair to play in the clothes again, speaking over her shoulder. "Bryce brought you and I some clothes it seems. If one of the nurses or Sean don't get in here soon we're going to have to figure out how to get you dressed."

"What do you mean?!" Marco spat indignantly. "I can dress myself!"

Ellie snorted and shook her head. Though Marco couldn't see her face he would have bet money she was rolling her eyes at him. "Marco, you've been in a bed for four months eating through a straw. I highly doubt you have enough energy to keep standing for that long."

Erk. Marco didn't like this little development one bit. Thinking back to yesterday when he had climbed out of bed to look in the mirror, he was horrified to realize that it _had_ been entirely too tiring, like he hadn't ever walked before, easily leaving him breathless and shaky, even after only a moment. Remembering this, he sadly agreed that standing by himself for prolonged amounts of time would probably be impossible.

"Then how was I able to shower? Change? How did I go to the _bathroom_?!" he cried near panic.

"Well, usually Sean would help, but when we're not around it's strictly the nurses. Bryce has helped a couple of times," Ellie hissed in a fit of playful spite. She was enjoying this too much, he thought.

Wait. Marco felt his eyes bug out unpleasantly. "Are you telling me that no less than three people have seem me_ naked!?!_"

Ellie's grin got even wider, nearing dramatic proportions. "No, more like _ten_. Different nurses, Sean, Bryce, and sometimes Nana. Though I must say the nurses are quite lucky getting a free show like that. We should have atleast sold tickets. Make some money off your comatose sexy self!"

Feeling the burning blush creep up his neck Marco groaned in embarrassment and dropped his face in his hands.

"**_Ewww!!!"_**

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Several minutes later, Ellie was still teasing him about his embarrassing predicament and he was still steadfastedly staring at his palms and whispering pleas of "no no no," though he sensed a bit of laughter seeping into his words by this point. Or mindless hysteria, he added.

"Honestly, Marco. Chill out. It's not like you're the only one here who's been seen. You're such a big baby," Ellie giggled out after his panic attack had gone on for too long.

"A BABY!?!? How would you feel!?!" Marco stopped and shook his head, frustrated, staring moodily down at his bedspread. "How many others _are _here anyway? _Where _am I? I thought I might have been in a hospital, but it seems too lived in for that. You said yourself it's been four whole monthes."

Ellie cocked an eyebrow at the unexpected question but humored him. "Well...welcome to Borgin's Marco. I guess you could call it a bit of a rehab center in a way. It's not for mental patients, but it's for those whose conditions would require an extended period of time under surveillance. Um, it's of course, for younger people, under the age of eighteen. There's about fifty people on this floor. There are four floors, you can do the math. Um...I think that's about it really. Not much to tell, especially considering you're leaving in the next hour."

Thank goodness, Marco thought. If this process was a 'one step at a time' thing then he couldn't wait to be _home_. Nodding a bit stupidly Marco twiddled his thumbs wondering what to say. Now that all the drama was over...there didn't seem to be too much to talk about.

He was still rather quiet due to the blow about his parents, but luckily no one was talking about that. In fact, he was waiting to talk to Nana later that night. He had decided, that if he was to have that conversation with anyone, it would be her. She always had a way of making things seem a whole lot better than they actually were. He'd gotten through many a scraped knee in his world because of her, andthe thought made him smile.

"So Bryce said that you wished gravity would do me in this morning. Is this true El?"

Marco looked up from where he was toying with his own fingers to see Sean standing in the doorway wearing his customary clothes, a hoody draped over one arm and a pair of shoes in his hands. He was smirking in much the same way Ellie seemed prone to do.

Ellie, for her part, turned around at his voice too, identical smirk crawling it's way forward. "Why yes I did. Are you allergic from waking up before the double digits or something?"

Sean's smirk grew wider and he strode over, dumping his things in the remaining empty chair. Swivelling around to Ellie he dragged a hand to his chest in mild dramatics. "You wound me El. You really wound me. I thought you loved me."

Shaking her head, Ellie reached forward and hugged him, snorting slightly. "I would love you better if you got here on time instead of drooling all over your pillow."

"I don't drool," he shot back in his flat voice, indicating to the world that he really didn't care one way or the other. He had a habit of that. Too blank to decipher. Annoying...but effective. No one knew what was going on in his head...and that was perhaps how Sean liked it.

"Yes you do."

Instead of Ellie, it had been Bryce who had retorted this time, walking in from the hallway with a bottle of water and a very sleepy looking Mr. Vaughn behind her. "I couldn't find any food. Well, atleast none that didn't come out of a machine in a plastic wrapper. I vote that we make something when we get home."

A chorus of "okays" and "sounds good" echoed around the room and Mr. Vaughn took a seat on the stool next to him. How many people had sat there recently?

"Ah, how are you feeling Mr. del Rossi? Remember anything?" Marco shook his head and sat up a bit straighter. "Alright. Do you have a headache? Even a small one?" Again Marco shook his head in the negative, fidgeting. "Good, good. You're not faint are you? Feel nauseous?"

"No sir. Really. I feel perfect. Just a bit exhausted. Need to sleep." The doctor stared down at him intensely for several seconds before he nodded very subtly.

"Alright. You're free to go." He stood, signing a form, and turned to Ellie. "Mrs. Nash...I'm trusting you to make sure he eats and sleeps today, alright? Quite frequently."

"Of course sir. Nana would throttle me."

Mr. Vaughn left the room, Bryce making faces at his retreating back, before turning back around. "Well, let's get you dressed shall we?"

Marco shrank back into the pillows, his stomach feeling as if it were shriveling up into nothing. "Uh...."

Ellie jumped in to explain. "He went bezerk after you left. He's scared to death of being seen naked." Marco blushed hotly again, hiding his face from view, waiting for the laughs to start. Oddly enough, they never did, only understanding smiles were thrown his way. To his surprise, Sean was the one to step forward, holding out his hand.

"I guess you'll just have to close your eyes then. Come on." Though the words might have seemed dismissive, the boy's voice said otherwise. It was gentle and encouraging...and it was all he needed to atleast swallow his pride and get on with it.

Grabbing the hand in a death grip he stripped off the blankets and swung his legs over the side of the mattress. The second his feet touched the tile floor he shivered harshly, taking a deep breath and attempting stand.

Attempting being the operative word. After an instant of standing in triumph he felt the weight bearing down on his knees become too heavy. With a startled squeak, which he would later deny being girly in any way, he fell back onto the bed in an unelegant sprawl of arms and legs.

Oomph. "El? I think you might have been right. I think I wasted all my energy yesterday."

"What do you mean, hun?"

Marco sat up on his elbows and looked up at everyone annoyed. "I got up to look in the mirror yesterday. You know, after I found out we were all seniors. I wanted to see if I looked older. Anyway, it had been hard, but now it feels even harder." Marco thought of something. "Oh yeah, while I'm thinking about it. I have two words for you El. Hair. Cut."

All the occupants in the room cracked up. Bryce, manically, as she always seemed to. Ellie, discreetly behind her hand. Sean, in a slightly wheezy way that you couldn't actually hear, but knew he was laughing very hard. It was interesting watching them all interact. He'd been doing it since the first girl had made an appearance early that morning. He supposed it was really all a way of catching up with the world, but he enjoyed it nonetheless.

Eventually the humor died down a bit and Sean stepped forward again, extending his hand. "Let's try this again."

This time they made it.

Marco grinned brightly all around the room, just stopping himself from clapping in self accomplishment. He did bounce up and down a bit on the balls of his feet, Ellie rolling her eyes at him. Losing balance he almost fell over, before he felt a pair ofstrong arms wrap around his waist. "Only you are stupid enough to finally stand up straight, and then ruin the moment by celebrating. You're such a dork."

Sean again. Marco snorted and made a face at him. "Oh...shut up. Let's go. Wouldn't want to celebrate again or anything." Bryce and Ellie smiled at them, knowing there was no heat behind the words, mostly because Marco was too busy trying not to laugh, as he was hauled manually to the bathroom.

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A bit later the two boys stumbled back out, one extremely red in the face and the other one making fun of him. They both stopped after the door swung open, seeing the girls were talking in one of the armchairs, Ellie in Bryce's lap and doubled over in laughter.

"What's so funny?" Marco questioned, thrown off. It was hard getting used to Ellie being with a girl. Really really hard. But he was trying.

"Oh nothing," Bryce chipped in. "We were just commenting on how thin the walls were. We could _hear _your embarrassment."

"Oh, shut up." Marco stopped, realizing something. "Can we go now? I mean....can I finally leave!?!"

At Ellie's brief nod Marco started bouncing on his feet again, earning rolled eyes from Sean. "Can we get him out of here then? Before he knocks me over?"

"Yeah, yeah," Ellie waved dismissively. "You know it's regulation to wheel them out in a chair anyway. Quit whining you."

And with that Marco was sat on the bed, and minutes later a sweet looking nurse came in, pushing a wheelchair and smiling pleasantly. "Hello dear. Ready to get home finally?"

Marco nodded as he was helped into the chair. "Yes ma'am. Very much so."

Being wheeled out of the building Marco looked down the halls wide-eyed, trying to take in everything. When they passed by a room he would look into them, craning his neck, seeing families crowded around beds and blaring TVs. But most of all he saw the elevator. The elevator that led _downstairs_.

Once they were out of the elevator he had a clear view of _the door_. The door that led to freedom. That led to freedom and discovery and life. He was so close! The entrance was made of glass and he could see the bright sunlight outside.

He was going _home_.

Rolling out through the doors he felt the first rays of sunlight hit his knees and then quickly slide up to his face, warming his skin and making him squint through the too bright light. It was nice. He wasn't in a sterile, ugly white room anymore. He was leaving. He was starting over.

In the rush of depositing him out of his wheelchair and into a silver suv he didn't have much time to reflect on what was going on. Bryce climbed in the driver's seat, Sean next to her, and Ellie joining him in the back. The car ride was quiet, sparse talk littering the silence. From what Ellie told him it was an hour drive back to the house so he settled into a nap only ten minutes in, feeling the exhaustion from not sleeping that night creep up on him. He wouldn't miss anything.

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"Hey Marco. We're home. Wake up love."

Marco blinked, stretching his arms up high above his head, feeling his shoulders pop. We're there? The fog of sleep disappated almost completely at that thought. We're there!

Grabbing onto Ellie's hand and then onto Sean's shoulder as he hauled himself out of the vehicle he looked up, feeling so happy to lay his eyes on the familiar sight of _home _at last

But it wasn't home.

"Ellie, isn't that Sean's house?"

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And there it is. They are now out of the Institution. Finally. And, for those of you still confused, if you want, just ask a question in your reviews and I can try to answer. Fwar. I don't mean to be so confusing. I promise.


	6. Time to Sleep

"Ellie, isn't that Sean's house?"

The red haired girl helping him stagger up to the house turned and raised an eyebrow at him, confusion written clearly across her face. Out of the corner of his eye he was aware of Sean doing the same thing, stumbling over a rock almost unnoticeably. Marco hid a smile at Sean's clumsiness and opened his mouth to ask again.

However the door opening and a very happy looking Nana bouncing out saved either of the teenagers from answering the other boy's rather odd question.

"Caro! You're home finally! Come, come, I have pancakes on the stove for all of you." Nana seemed to be full to bursting with excitement, hopping from foot to foot and ushering them towards the house with wide sweeping motions. Marco couldn't keep the grin from his face at her antics, the question from a moment ago forgotten for now in the wake of seeing his grandmother again.

Inside the house Marco noticed that it looked nothing like Sean's house had been in his mind. The walls of the den were painted a dusky orange and there was furniture littered around the room, magazines and jackets thrown here and there. The newly added photographs clinging to the walls were all, not of Sean's family, but five familiar faces stared out as well as a few others that he recognized.

Moving quickly Ellie and Sean pushed and pulled him into the kitchen where he was dumped into a chair at the table. While everyone collapsed into their own respective chairs Marco looked around at his surroundings wildly, eyes jumping and bouncing as if they would never stop, unable to land on one thing.

The walls were a dark yellow and the table cloth under his hand was a dark green and covered in fruits. The entire room looked forcefully rustic and antique, even a little out of place with the shiny appliances on the counters. Golden summer light poured in to the room from the window behind Sean and lit everything with a content glow. If this was indeed home...he rather thought he could grow to like it.

"Ellie, do we live here?"

The girl, who had been filling glasses with what looked like grape juice at the counter turned her head to look at Marco over her shoulder, strands of red falling down into her eyes. "Marco, I don't understand. You obviously know something we don't. Why did you mention this being Sean's house earlier?"

Marco didn't answer momentarily, thrown off by how bright her hair looked in this light, but quickly shook his head. "In my world...er, my mind I mean, this is where Sean lived. I lived a couple of blocks from Degrassi. Sean lived here. And you lived halfway across town."

Nana stepped forward and placed a plate of steaming pancakes in front of him and raised her eyebrows in amusement. She didn't say anything though, only continued to place the plates of food on the table, Ellie running around behind her with the drinks. They ran like clockwork, he Marco noticed. Sean got up from his place and grabbed forks from a drawer while Bryce stood also to put the used dishes in the sink. A great flurry of activity. Calculated chaos. Marco could only sit in awe. They worked together seamlessly. They'd done this before, that much was evident.

Finally, the movement died down and all five of the room's occupants sat at the table. Silverware scraped plates and the group began to eat. After a few bites Ellie finally stopped and looked up at him curiously. "Well, I suppose that makes sense. There's a story to it really."

"Tell me. I feel so confused."

It wasn't Ellie who spoke but Sean. "I did live here. For awhile...with Tracker. Then he left with a job offer somewhere else...and I stayed here. I was dating Ellie at the time."

Ellie took this as her cue and jumped in. "I stayed over almost every night. My mother was still in the middle of her drinking stage and I hated the idea of being trapped in that house so often."

"Then there was the fire," Sean whispered.

Ellie nodded and continued in the same hushed tone. "The party...I got caught staying with Sean. That night I told my mom about the cutting....that was when my mother finally grew up and decided to go to rehab. I moved in the next day. Does this all sound familiar?"

Marco nodded and a lull fell over the table. It stayed silent until Nana looked up and caught his eyes.

"And then we lost the house."

"What?" he asked, trying in vain to get the upperhand on the conversation. He'd just lost the track he he'd been running so smoothly on.

Bryce jumped in. "Since it was just you and Nana...there wasn't much money. Nana had reached retirement age a few years ago and no one wanted to hire her. Eventually, what little money you two had...was gone. The house was just too expensive to keep anymore."

"So we all got together, and decided, a joint house would be best. I could take care of all you children...and you could take care of me in return. You all seemed to practically live with each other to begin with anyway, so I didn't see how any bad could come from it," Nana whispered.

Ellie smiled at Nana. "It was a very good idea, Nana. We all benefitted from it." She stopped and turned her gaze to Marco. "So here we've been. I suppose in a way... we are living in Sean's house. However the documents have Nana's name on them now."

Marco nodded slowly, trying to piece all of this information together so it could flow better. "So, it was Sean's. Then it was you and Sean's. Then finally Me, Nana, Ellie, and Sean's? Where does Bryce come in?"

Bryce looked up from where she had been making pictures in her syrup and smiled at him. "I don't live here. I told you, I live out of town. I spend the night sometimes, but my dad needs me there."

Silence reigned again, but this time no one made too much of an effort trying to fill it. Vague questions about leaving the hospital filtered in every now and then but for the most part the meal finished without anymore great secrets popping up, for which Marco was terribly grateful. He'd had enough surprises in the last two days to last him a lifetime. Before he knew it the dishes were being cleared away, people were running off to find things to occupy themselves, and he was being told to go to sleep again to his great dismay.

"But Nana! I slept in the car. I'm not tired at all. Honest!" Puppy dog eyes met his grandmother's stern glare and Marco knew he had lost before he had even got started. Darn parental figure type people.

"Fine. Fine." Marco ground out between his teeth and began to stand up before he realized that he was lost in what was "_his own_" house.

"Um, El? I think I need directions."

Ellie was engrossed in what looked like an Anne McCaffrey novel beside him at the table and didn't even look up at his inquiry. "Sean, will you help him hobble to his bedroom? I'm at the funeral of Petiron and...."

Sean snorted and looked up from the television show blaring from the screen to make fish eyes at the other girl over the couch's back. "You have got to be kidding me. You've read that book a million times already! You've read _all _that woman's books a million times!"

The red head did stop her reading at that, keeping her finger on the line she had reached before growling in disgust and staring at Sean in disbelief. "What about those dumb automotive magazines you carry around? You've looked through all of those a _million_ times! And what are you going to miss on that show anyway?"

Marco's face had contorted into an expression of abstract humor at the very beginning of this exchange and now he turned to Bryce. She rolled her eyes and clamped a hand down on Ellie's mouth mid-tirade. "Geez. I'll take him. Try not to kill each other before I get back."

The brunette girl smirked at Marco before she stood up, stretching. She stopped, stared at her hand, then began rubbing it on her baggy jeans as if it was revolting. "Ew, Ellie cooties. Come on, Marco, let's get you in nappies and in bed. I've got to go home soon," she said as she drug Marco out of his chair at the table.

For his part, he followed silently and without a struggle, actually feeling exhaustion creeping into his bones. Surely he couldn't be tired already. It was only noon! But the ache he was feeling was testament otherwise so he climbed into bed without a fuss, not even coherent enough by this point to look at his surroundings. Nor did he notice the lights going out or the voice telling him goodnight.

He dreamed of Dylan.

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Marco woke up a few hours later, groggy and completely disoriented as if he had taken sleeping pills or drank too much. There was something warm on his chest and it made him smile.

"Hey Dylan. You would not believe the crazy dream I had last night. I was at your hockey game and..."

Marco's hand had absent-mindedly dropped down to play with his boyfriend's hair when he noticed the first sign that this wasn't who he thought it was. This person was smaller. Very much smaller. And the hair was short and definitely not curly.

Feeling panic rising up quickly Marco's eyes snapped open to see just who he was fondling and talking to at this hour.

"HOLY SHIT! ELLIE! HELP HELP!! **_RAT_**!!!!"

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Review! Or I will sic the rat after you!


	7. Rats

Another chapter of this finally. lol

ReRe- you've stuck with me through all of my work and always leave me wonderful reviews. I'd just like to thank you. It's very much appreciated.

Blue Leah- also would like to thank you. You appear all of the sudden quite frequently and it's so nice to see you. Thanks for the reviews.

Melissa- Do you even _want _me to go into what I think of you? Would you like an essay longer than this chapter on "Why do I love You?" Well, I'll spare you and just say thank you for everything.

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"HOLY SHIT! ELLIE! HELP HELP!! **_RAT_**!!!!"

With energy from gods only knew where Marco flung himself from the bed, falling on the floor flat on his face in a tangle of blankets and awkward limbs. Still struggling like a drowning man he could feel the rodent squirming around the bed clothes, deftly avoiding his swinging arms and legs until it found its' way on top of his head.

Marco shrieked as loudly as physically possible, his flailing increasing to dangerous levels. "Ellie!" A moment of thrashing later two bleary and fearful people crashed into his room, flipping on the lights and eyes darting wildly. They took in everything with one look. Marco on the floor trapped by his own blankets and a furry animal on his head before both Ellie and Sean fell into a roaring fit of laughter.

Marco cocked his head to the side, eyebrows drawing together in confusion. It wasn't until Ellie moved from the doorway, still clutching at a stitch at her side from the laughing, and plucked the animal from his head did he finally calm down. But...why wasn't Ellie screaming? He knew she hated mice and rats almost as much as he did.

Still laughing at what appeared to be a very funny inside joke, Sean stepped forward, red faced and breathing heavily to help him back to his feet and off of the floor. Once he was standing Marco glared at the disgusting, little, hairy beast. Ellie only rolled her eyes.

"Marco, it's a ferret." The dark haired boy continued to scowl at it. What the creature was didn't make him hate it any less. "It's more of a weasel really," she continued in a hurry, obviously trying to win him over. "And it's well behaved and house trained. It won't hurt you at all."

Marco growled testily. "It still looks like rat."

"That's what I told her," a breathy Sean said, nodding emphatically. "I wouldn't let the thing near me for a month." He reached over, taking the ferret from the red head's arms. "But, you'll get used to it. Promise. I did."

Marco's expression didn't change, and Ellie rolled her eyes again. "Oh forget it for now. Are you okay?" At his nod she yawned and blinked tiredly. "Good, because it's midnight and now that we know you're not dying I am going to go back to bed. Buona notte."

Pecking her friend on the cheek Ellie shuffled out of the room, disappearing off to the left and out of sight, leaving him and Sean in the room. The blonde boy looked decidedly uncomfortable, staring at the ferret or the floor instead of up at the other room's occupant.

Finally, after several minutes of awkward silence, Sean cleared his throat in an almost embarrassed way, nodding stiffly to the Italian boy. "Well, I'll just put, uh, Elmer in his cage so he doesn't jump on you again. He...erm, usually sleeps in here with you."

He looked up and met eyes with Marco for the first time during the entire episode. "Anyway, I'll see you in the AM." Sean nodded the same rushed nod as before and turned, leaving quickly without so much as a smile.

Hm.

Sighing entirely too loudly for the intense quiet around him Marco threw himself back on the bed. _Wonder what his problem is, _he mused, staring vacantly at the ceiling. After a few minutes to get over the damn "ferret" or whatever it was, and also Sean's odd behavior, Marco finally swivelled his head around to look at the room he was in at last.

It was a smaller room, definitely tiny compared to his old one. The walls were in a jeweled blue color that reminded him of the waters of some tropical island. His bed was also much smaller than the one in his former home, and it was covered in a mishmash of sheets and blankets, some an ugly yellow and some blue. The pillows were a rather unattractive off white, the same as the curtains. It was apparent they were hand-me-downs.

On the wall above the headboard pictures from magazines were littered in a kaleidoscope of celebrities and cut out words. A giant full length mirror stood next to what he could only guess was his closet due to the panelled doors and the scarf hanging off of the handle. It felt 

Yep, he could definitely live here.

Smiling in a decidedly mischevious way, and feeling a newfound sense of energy from his sleep earlier, Marco found himself rising from his bed and eventually walking out into the cold hallway, clutching onto the wall for support after feeling the weakness in his knees.

For a whole hour Marco simply meandered through the house. In the hallway alone he spent most of his time, simply gazing at the pictures that lined the wall, stepping into a virtual time machine and smiling back at all the grins he found.

A picture of Sean in front of a car. Ellie on a horse in the middle of a field. Nana cooking. Himself making a silly face wearing a pink tiara from a children's dress up kit, the picture beside it of Sean with a fuzzy boa wrapped around his shoulders that he presumed came with it. Ellie and Bryce kissing. Elmer sleeping on Sean's head. So many little chunks of his life here on display. All of it was...gone.

Feeling something cold seep into his stomach Marco abandoned the smiling hallway, walking farther down. On his right stood a black door with a poster of a band on it, the letters AFI blaring out in bold red at the bottom. Ellie's room. Of course. Not two feet ahead stood another door, plain white and boring with only a hoodie draped on the doorknob as a clue. Sean's.

Finally he reached the opening on the left side of the hallway that led into the den and he walked through it quickly, still holding onto the wall for dear life. It seemed kind of spooky with only a lamp on and the impenetrable silence that can only come when you _know _people are asleep. The air always seems thicker somehow and the lights appear dimmer, as if even they, inanimate things in another room, were trying to lull their master's to sleep.

Marco stumbled over, throwing his arms out to catch himself on the back of the couch before he fell, hands landing on a hoodie that was draped there. He stared at it oddly, as if it confused him, running a hand over it softly. Ellie's dragon book that she had been reading earlier that morning sat on the table beside the couch, and he felt the same overwhelming urge to touch it, as if his world would piece itself back together just by these familiar touches alone.

He didn't know a thing about the Sean and Ellie in this world. Sean was messy? Who knew? Ellie was a closet nerd, reading middle-earth novels? Was this even news?

Letting the paperback fall onto the couch with a dull thud Marco hobbled off to the kitchen, his stomach gnawing with hunger, breakfast from so long ago only a distant memory.

He was sitting at the kitchen table with a bag of Cheetohs later, humming some stupid song in his head as he read the box. Hm hm hm hmmmm.

_Find me here._

_Speak to me._

Marco inhaled sharply. A pair of bright blue eyes flashing across his mind. Laughter. A boat. Soaked clothes. Drying out in the sun.

The clicking noise of chips falling on the floor made Marco jump and push away the memories, reminding himself for the ten millionth time that day that his hopes might be in vain. That Dylan might not even _exist._ Feeling a knot forming in his throat he began picking up all the little snacks off the floor, nearly jumping out of his skin when a door closed in the hallway. Stock still and wide-eyed, Marco waited with bated breath to see who was awake.

Finally, after what felt like ages later, Nana, bundled up in a flowery dressing gown, appeared. She seemed surprised to see her grandson awake momentarily, but a second later she smiled widely.

"You really should not be eating that. I make you some macaroni and cheese, yes?"

Marco nodded enthusiastically, putting up the chips with a sheepish grin. He was thankful for the company of another person instead of his troubling thoughts. As he watched his grandmother cook he decided he might as well say something. Talk about one of the many things going through his head.

"Um, Bryce seems nice."

Nana paused, looking up from the boiling water and reaching over to get the package of noodles from the counter as she looked over her shoulder and smiled. "Yes, she is a very sweet girl. Never hurt Ellie."

Marco could feel the corner of his mouth treatening to turn up. "So you know about the two of them?"

"That they are an item? Of course."

The boy settled more heavily into his chair and looked down at the table...thinking. _Surely she knows about me then_. He looked up, feeling the knots of fear seize his stomach, a question on the tip of his tongue.

"Yes, I know you are gay," the elderly woman said, not even looking up from the pasta she was mixing. "I've known for a very long time now."

Marco nodded as if he'd been stricken, grateful and relieved, not yet completely comprehending the meaning, but knowing he was in a very good position judging by the warmth spreading in his stomach. A bowl of macaroni and cheese was placed in front of him and conversation strayed onto lighter topics like coming home from the institute and food. Nothing on the family, or parents, or even on his loss of memory. Just a nice moment of peace before the next day began.

It was only later, tucked back in his bed, did Marco allow himself to think about anything. Before he had gotten under the covers he had investigated his room one last time. In the top drawer of his nightstand he had found a framed photograph. His mother and father smiling out at him, their arms around his shoulders. He looked at it now.

And not for the first time did Marco cry himself to sleep.

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Review! Please! I'm hungry for them! I only got three last time! lol. Ah, you know I love you guys.


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